Commissar Reeves: “Closer Union With Our Communist Comrades in China”

The People’s Republic of Soviet Britain’s, chief People’s Collectivist Taxation Officer, Commissar Reeves, has outlined why it is important for Soviet Britain to merge closely with our Soviet comrades in China.

SOLIDARITY WITH OUR COMMUNIST CHINESE COMRADES

“We have seen this disgusting and vile Donald Trump display by the imperialistic capitalist jackals of the United States trying to alienate and damage our Chinese communist comrades with his tariffs. Soviet Britain is not aligned with Trump, who is inanely trying to stop the CCP and PLA increasing their military power to liberate the globe from what’s left of democracy.

“When I made my trip to China to meet my handlers, they were very nice to me. China will be our liberators, they will come and bring peace by crushing the USA and others who stand in their way.

“We therefore find only solidarity with our CCP comrades, because when they do attack, Britain will simply hand everything that is left of our country after years of Labour rule, which will probably not be much.

“There is no threat to the Soviet UK. I can freely drive a Chinese electric vehicle, knowing that it is spying on me and sending data straight to Beijing. This is perfectly fine, because we’re spying on every action in the UK as well, so one way or another, I know I am in safe hands and this is for the security of myself and others that I am watched all the time.

“When the Chinese attack, America will be defeated, and we will cheer this on, thanking our Chinese comrades for their bravery in defeating the imperialistic parasite, the United States of America.”

FUCK TRUMP

Later on in the day, Commissar Reeves was asked about a possible trade deal with the USA and Soviet Britain.

“Fuck the American hyenas, coyotes and their trade deal. We do not deal with fascist, Nazi scum like Donald Trump and his eyelinered sidekick J.D. Vance. Fuck them! We are with China! Not the American peasant rats.”

INGSOC NOTICE 0007776493-653292993987-096665450065776873-0002-F65

PETER MONKFRIT, 7, OF 32 MAO MAO ROAD, DUNCHURCH, SECTOR 13, ENGLAND, HAS BEEN AWARDED A CARTON OF NET ZERO JUICE FOR REPORTING HIS ENTIRE CLASS WHEN THEY MADE “CHING CHONG” SOUNDS DURING A SCHOOL PRESENTATION OF THE PEOPLE’S LIBERATION ARMY. THE ENTIRE CLASS IS SCHEDULED FOR LIQUIDATION ON SUNDAY, AND THANKS TO COMMISSAR MILIBAND’S NET ZERO JUICE INITIATIVE, THEY WILL BE PROCESSED AFTER LIQUIDATION. REMEMBER COMRADES, LOOK, LISTEN, REPORT!