Horses Close to Extinction in UK and Europe

LONDON - England - There are fears that all of Europe's horses may have been eaten, nature conservationists have revealed.

“We can’t find any horses in Europe any more. We’ve eaten them all and we need to bring in horses from South America or North America,” Edoardo Montelban, a conservationist for the World Wildlife Fund based in Madrid, Spain told the BBC yesterday.

There has not been a horse race in Britain for weeks as there are no horses left in mainland Britain.

“Someone ate the whole bloody 2.30 Cheltenham race and now we’ve just got a retired John McCririck running up and down the course commentating on non-existent horses,” a race punter said.

If anyone sees any horses in the UK please contact: Horse Conservation Group, Not the Findus Factory, Cheltenham, Gloucestershire, GL2 AAA

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by
    Tags: uk

    Recent Posts

    “I WILL CARRY ON! CHAOS! I WILL CARRY ON! CHAOS! CHAOSSSSS!”

    PLANET SCUNTHORPE - KEIR DAVROS HAS MADE A DEFIANT SPEECH IN DEFENCE OF HIS RULE.

    20 hours ago

    Artificial Intelligence Emerging as a Key Competitive Advantage in Cybersecurity, New Report Finds

    GENEVA - Switzerland - Artificial intelligence is transforming the cybersecurity landscape at an unprecedented pace…

    3 days ago

    Comical Starmer Reassures Labour Party After Election Drubbing

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Comical Starmer has reassured Labour Party members that everything is okay…

    4 days ago

    LOCAL ELECTION RESULTS: “Comrades, everything is okay. Nothing has changed!”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Comrade Starmer is defiant despite massive Labour Party losses with the…

    5 days ago

    VOTE LABOUR: “Comrades, today I am ordering you to vote for Labour”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Supreme Comrade Starmer is ordering all citizens of the People's Republic…

    6 days ago

    We’re Giving Away 1,000 FREE Tickets on an EXCLUSIVE Hantavirus Cruise

    SOUTHAMPTON - England - The Daily Squib is giving away 1,000 free tickets on an…

    1 week ago

    This website uses cookies.