Comrade Obama Urges You to Drop the Guns for the Children’s Sake

WASHINGTON DC - USA - Comrade Obama has addressed the Soviet American nation in a speech that brought many to tears of joy.

The supreme soviet comrade was seen yesterday on a stage with many soviet children as he urged the soviet American nation’s gun owners to relinquish their weapons so that they can be disarmed and pliant to the 5-year soviet plan of complete collectivist sovietization.

“Comrades, just like other previous comrades and tyrants, I too am using children as a cynical front for my disarmament activities on the U.S. public.

“Unfortunately for me I cannot continue the complete sovietization of America until you are all completely disarmed. We will drip feed this protocol by first banning certain ammunition magazines and certain other dangerous arms. Once this is done, you, the public will not have the same military grade ammunition or weapons as the soviet forces who are readying themselves right now.

“We will then move in for the final ban, which will be a complete outlawing of all arms from the public. As a weakened civilian force due to armament bans, we will thus be able to disarm you quickly and efficiently. There may be a few pockets of resistance but you will not survive the soviet might of the DHS, ATF and other agencies.

“I, as your supreme commander therefore command you henceforth to relinquish your weapons in a peaceful manner or you and your family will eventually be liquidated. We can do this the peaceful way or the not so peaceful way,” comrade Obama said to the sound of cheering soviet children.


ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Reader support keeps the caffeine flowing.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by
    Tags: gunsobama

    Recent Posts

    Labour Mourns Downfall of Leftist Celebrity Hero Russell Brand

    MANCHESTER - England - The far-left and Labour Party are today mourning the downfall of…

    3 days ago

    Convicted Rapist Russell Brand to go to Prison

    LONDON - England - Former celebrity Russell Brand has been convicted of rape.

    4 days ago

    US Midterms: Lame Duck Trump Just Got Ducked in the …

    WASHINGTON - D.C. - There's blood on the cities of America after a midterm election…

    5 days ago

    Why Mission Uncrossable Became a Crash Phenomenon

    LONDON - England - When it comes to crash-style gaming, Mission Uncrossable is making huge…

    6 days ago

    London 2026 – The City of Shit

    LONDON - England - The capital city of Britain was once a great city but…

    1 week ago

    BUDGET SECRETS – Why Labour Needs the Neets

    MANCHESTER - England - It was a great Labour budget yesterday for the NEETS and…

    2 weeks ago

    This website uses cookies.