Bible Historians Uncover Scripture Revealing That Jesus Could Not Swim

Found in a dusty forgotten corner of Jerusalem, bible historians and archaeologists have recovered parchment papers revealing the incredible discovery that Jesus Christ of Nazereth, otherwise known as the Messiah could not swim — but he could walk on water, amongst his many miracles.

Professor of Theology at Arkansas University, Brad Furlong, discovered the parchment which dates back to the first century AD.

“The parchment was part of the New Testament and it was signed by the apostle St. Paul. It details the fact that Jesus was a very poor swimmer, and nearly drowned once when he fell off his fishing boat. The fact that Jesus could walk on water was only mentioned at the end of the short script, and St. Paul reckons that Jesus was given a helping hand by God when he walked on water.”

The archaeological team worked for six weeks to uncover the find and avoided any coronavirus lockdown in place.

“By the grace of God, and the saviour of humankind, Jesus, we were able to find this rare parchment which we will give to the Vatican library for safe keeping,” the professor added.

Christians across the globe were astounded at the new news about Jesus, and have started Christian swimming clubs to praise their Lord. No one however has mastered the art of walking on water yet.