New Cristina Kirchner Portrait Shows Troubled Soul

“She looks rather tired. Somewhat miserable and gloomy in the photograph. I just hope she’ll get over this Malvinas business and go back to her plastic surgery sessions. She’s really out of her depth,” Argentinian politician, Augusto Galtieri, told a group of reporters outside the country’s parliament.

Mrs Kirchner, however ignored the advice of the opposition party’s politicians and dug down even deeper with more rhetoric against the people of the Falkland Isles.

“I was just on the phone to my old friend Sean Penn, and he told me that we need to get those Gringos out of our islands. He’ll be on the battleship when we invade Port Stanley. What a brave fella he is. Viva Argentina!”