September to be Renamed '9/11 Month'

NEW YORK - USA - It's that time of year again. The month of September when Americans make the world aware of what happened to them all those years ago.

Speaking at the hallowed ground of ground zero, Mayor Blumburger said: “Ten Septembers ago a tragedy befell America where 4,000 people died in the twin towers. This is why we’re renaming the month of September, ‘911 month’ because that is exactly what it is. The question is folks. Cui bono? Who benefitted from that attack on that fateful day? It certainly was not any Arab nation or Muslims who are now a pariah around the world. Think to yourself for one second, what did 911 allow America to do? I’ll tell you, many things like invading oil rich countries, shutting down civil liberties and creating a mass of jingoistic nationalism amongst Americans. They didn’t scramble one Air Force jet that day. Why? It was the precursor for the Project for the New American Century, which was written way before the tragedy of 911 ever happened. The people who wrote the PNAC were asking for a new Pearl Harbour, a catalyst, they wanted it, they prayed for it. Ask yourselves again, for one second, who gained from the demolition of the towers? This is why September will be renamed because we want everyone to remember what happened to us. What you saw that day is imbedded in your brain, it is etched like a Leonardo Da Vinci masterpiece deep in your lobes. Everywhere you look, the media utters the words, every media source is on permanent 911 loop, you cannot escape from it. Repetition, repetition, repetition. It is the old Soviet trick they are utilising, to bore it into your brain. Never mind that there were far worse tragedies meted out onto lesser beings (i.e. non-Americans). Look at the Japanese, a hardy people who have had two atomic weapons dropped on them, massive tsunamis, powerstation leaks and earthquakes. You do not hear a whimper from these people. They get on with their lives, they do not ask for people to feel sorry for them or plaster the world’s media with their misery. I look at the Japanese, and I bow my head with respect. They are not blubbering cry babies, they are hardy warriors who get on with their lives and do not pollute the air waves with their constant memorials. I’m off to play a round of golf right now, to get on with my life, and urge you all to do the same.”

American politicians and historians are thus proposing that the world adopts ‘911 Month’ replacing September which was originally derived from the Latin, septem meaning “seven” and septimus “seventh”.

September was in fact the seventh month of the Roman calendar until 153 BC, when the first month changed from Kalendas Martius (1 March) to Kalendas Januarius (1 January).

From now on September will be rubbed from calendars worldwide and replaced by ‘911 month’. Never forget, and if you do, they will make you remember.

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    “I WILL CARRY ON! CHAOS! I WILL CARRY ON! CHAOS! CHAOSSSSS!”

    PLANET SCUNTHORPE - KEIR DAVROS HAS MADE A DEFIANT SPEECH IN DEFENCE OF HIS RULE.

    3 hours ago

    Artificial Intelligence Emerging as a Key Competitive Advantage in Cybersecurity, New Report Finds

    GENEVA - Switzerland - Artificial intelligence is transforming the cybersecurity landscape at an unprecedented pace…

    2 days ago

    Comical Starmer Reassures Labour Party After Election Drubbing

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Comical Starmer has reassured Labour Party members that everything is okay…

    4 days ago

    LOCAL ELECTION RESULTS: “Comrades, everything is okay. Nothing has changed!”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Comrade Starmer is defiant despite massive Labour Party losses with the…

    4 days ago

    VOTE LABOUR: “Comrades, today I am ordering you to vote for Labour”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Supreme Comrade Starmer is ordering all citizens of the People's Republic…

    5 days ago

    We’re Giving Away 1,000 FREE Tickets on an EXCLUSIVE Hantavirus Cruise

    SOUTHAMPTON - England - The Daily Squib is giving away 1,000 free tickets on an…

    1 week ago

    This website uses cookies.