World

Scaramanga Vows to Get Back at Trump After White House Firing

WASHINGTON D.C. - USA - Donald Trump hailed “a great day at the White House” following the removal of communications director Scaramanga after just 10 days.

“I have invited Donald to my little secluded island off the coast of China for a duel to the death. I have a very special surprise for the Teflon Don, Nick Nack will greet him when he lands on the beach, and the deadly duel will start from there, of course only after a brief civilised luncheon,” the fired communications director, Scaramanga revealed on Tuesday.

Apart from being a deadly shot, Scaramanga also has a distinctive extra appendage to wow the ladies with.

“Yes, I have three nipples, it is a sign of greatness, and I also pride myself in being a paranoid schizophrenic.”

The President, who was instrumental in the firing of Scaramanga says he has accepted the invitation to the secluded island only on the proviso that he gets to take Goodnight with him back to the White House as his new plaything. Shush, don’t tell Melania.

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Reader support keeps the caffeine flowing.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    Nvidia’s Huang Put His Wang in a Huang

    SILICON VALLEY - USA - Nvidia shares have fallen sharply after the CEO Jensen Huang…

    18 mins ago

    Labour Mourns Downfall of Leftist Celebrity Hero Russell Brand

    MANCHESTER - England - The far-left and Labour Party are today mourning the downfall of…

    3 days ago

    Convicted Rapist Russell Brand to go to Prison

    LONDON - England - Former celebrity Russell Brand has been convicted of rape.

    4 days ago

    US Midterms: Lame Duck Trump Just Got Ducked in the …

    WASHINGTON - D.C. - There's blood on the cities of America after a midterm election…

    5 days ago

    Why Mission Uncrossable Became a Crash Phenomenon

    LONDON - England - When it comes to crash-style gaming, Mission Uncrossable is making huge…

    6 days ago

    London 2026 – The City of Shit

    LONDON - England - The capital city of Britain was once a great city but…

    1 week ago

    This website uses cookies.