Tories to Inherit Britain’s Chav Generation

Even if the Tories ever come into power, they will inherit a chav generation of young people who are now a majority within the UK’s population.

“Statistically speaking, over 94% of Britain’s youth are now chav under class miscreants. This subsection of the population has also been extended to the now impoverished middle classes. Under Labour, everyone is now a chav. One only has to watch British TV and walk the streets to see the depths to which the UK has plummeted in intelligence levels. Labour has succeeded in dumbing down over two generations of youth to the level of amoeba,” Johnson Merrick, chief statistician for TORI polls told the Daily Mail.

It is already extremely hard for employers to employ anyone of any value because of the amount of people who can only write using chav text language.

“They have no ability to incorporate language, basic mathematics, logic or historical and scientific analysis. These chavs, as they are called, have infected all strata of society and all media. Their celebrities have also infected every media source and part of our lives to the point of exhaustion. I can’t see any way the Tories can reverse this attack on humanity,” a Westminster political commentator told the Times on Sunday.

Labour controllers at the Fabian Society have also admitted why they engineered the ‘chav’ in the first place.

“We knew that we needed a long lasting legacy for Britain, that is, apart from total economic ruin. We engineered the chav to infiltrate and corrupt everything about human decency, education and society. This way we could break down all class to be that of the chav class. By destroying the upper classes that have blighted Britain for many centuries by their education, success and leadership, we could bring them all down to the chav class. There is now a semblance of equality in Britain, where chavs now rule. You can see for yourself. Why not stand at a bus stop in some shit hole provincial town on a Friday or Saturday night and see how long you last before a group of chavs come along, beat the living shit out of you and stab you through the ankles with six inch kitchen knives?” Ed Balls, senior controller for the Fabian Society told the Observer.