Octomom to Create Tent City for Her Children

LOS ANGELES - USA - Octomom has told of her wishes to have even more kids and to start a refugee camp tent city in her back garden populated exclusively with her own children.

“I’m feeling an itch in my uterus, I gotta spawn more kids right now!” Octomom, Nadya Suleman, squeals as she squats on her kitchen table and strains her face whilst making grunting noises.

The world famous Octomom has been limbering up to shoot out more sprogs into the media ionosphere of cheap headlines and even cheaper photoshoots.

“This is an incredible moment, she already has 23 kids and she still wants more. She’s not even Catholic we understand but she’s still going to squirt out some more brats. I heard last night that she wants to go for the big ten. Yes, you read that right, the big ten babies all at the same time. They’ll be bursting through her mouth at this rate,” Johnson Arafat, a media commentator for the ABC news network said yesterday.

Refugee camp

Miss Suleman has already planned for the new arrivals and set up some extra tents in her back garden with more latrine holes. The United Nations may also get involved by dropping food rations over the fence as well as basic medical supplies when needed.

“I can’t even afford to feed myself or the rest of my 23 kids but I still want to have more kids damn it! I’m appealing to all Americans to support me and send me a few dollars so I can have the strength to have more f*cking babies,” the Octomom said on the Oprah Winfrey Show.

Luckily for her, the staff in the Daily Squib office had a whip round and came up with enough money for the Octomom to get herself irreversibly sterilised.

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Reader support keeps the caffeine flowing.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    LAMMY: Mandem to be Released Early

    LONDON - England - Labour Justice Secretary David Lammy is to release up to 6,000…

    1 day ago

    15th Five-Year Plan: What China’s Development Means to the World

    DALIAN - China - The World Economic Forum meeting is upbeat about China’s 15th Five-Year…

    2 days ago

    When Mother Earth Speaks Humans Still Do Not Listen

    CARACAS - Venezuela - A 7.5 magnitude earthquake is a small reminder that humans are…

    2 days ago

    Unelected Comrade Burnham Ushering New Era of Communism

    MANCHESTER - England - Unelected Comrade Burnham has destroyed the last vestiges of democracy as…

    5 days ago

    People’s Republic of Soviet Britain Urgent Bulletin Regarding Comrade Starmer

    MANCHESTER - England - Good news comrades. Comrade Starmer has been apprehended and made into…

    5 days ago

    “Comrades, they are coming for me on Monday! This is it!”

    UNDISCLOSED LOCATION - Comrade Starmer has revealed in a communique that a dastardly coup is…

    6 days ago

    This website uses cookies.