Gordon Brown Endorses Tony Blair

Tony Blair”s hopes of becoming the new EU President were dashed today as the unelected premier, Gordon Brown, publicly backed him.

“As soon as Gordon started publicly campaigning for Tony it was all over. The reverse-Midas touch of Gordo was unleashed and Tony was dropped like a hot potato by the EU technocrats who control everything in the undemocratic EU state,” a campaigner for Mr Blair told the Daily Telegraph.

Tony Blair was not available for comment but was said to be privately fuming that Gordon Brown had once again worked his dog turd magic on his presidential hopes.

“I think Tony must have thrown his TV through one of his many mansion windows after he heard that Brown was involved. What’s that sound I hear? It’s the sound of Cherie Blair sharpening a knife or two to thank Gordon Brown for his support. The expense account alone for this presidential job was enormous to say the least. The Blairs will be mourning the loss of this taxpayer funded goldmine and even though they own a dozen or so high end properties and are swimming in lucrative banking deals, they still want more, more, more,” Ari Fleischinger, press secretary for Tony Blair told Sky News.