Woman Who Pretended to Be Man Who Pretended to Be Woman Had Sex With Woman Who Pretended to Be Man and Woman

CHESTER - England - After fourteen gruelling days outlining the case, a woman has been successfully put behind bars for eight years for being very, very confusing.

A very confused young person who pretended to be a man but was really a woman pretending to be a man and a woman pretending to be a man was caught wearing a prosthetic penis and vagina and fake breasts with a hairy chest wig and sentenced for three counts of confusion today at Chester Crown Court.

The court hearing took 14 days just to hear about the numerous identities the confused person adopted, and the Judge had to stop the hearing 45 times so that the jurors could even begin to understand what the hell was going on.

“We had venn diagrams, flow charts, experts with slide shows, algorithms and a large prosthetic penis was slapped around. People were holding their heads in confusion and even the judge would roll his eyes every few minutes,” a court observer told the BBC.

After the court case the Judge said: “I’m still confused. What just happened here, anyone? Can you tell me anything? What about you?”

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Reader support keeps the caffeine flowing.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by
    Tags: crimeuk

    Recent Posts

    LAMMY: Mandem to be Released Early

    LONDON - England - Labour Justice Secretary David Lammy is to release up to 6,000…

    4 hours ago

    15th Five-Year Plan: What China’s Development Means to the World

    DALIAN - China - The World Economic Forum meeting is upbeat about China’s 15th Five-Year…

    16 hours ago

    When Mother Earth Speaks Humans Still Do Not Listen

    CARACAS - Venezuela - A 7.5 magnitude earthquake is a small reminder that humans are…

    23 hours ago

    Unelected Comrade Burnham Ushering New Era of Communism

    MANCHESTER - England - Unelected Comrade Burnham has destroyed the last vestiges of democracy as…

    4 days ago

    People’s Republic of Soviet Britain Urgent Bulletin Regarding Comrade Starmer

    MANCHESTER - England - Good news comrades. Comrade Starmer has been apprehended and made into…

    4 days ago

    “Comrades, they are coming for me on Monday! This is it!”

    UNDISCLOSED LOCATION - Comrade Starmer has revealed in a communique that a dastardly coup is…

    5 days ago

    This website uses cookies.