Sochi Lesbians Kiss on the Slopes

SOCHI - Russia - The Winter Olympics got off to a racy start with some icy tonsil hockey that would melt even the frostiest Russian bigot.

Two slalom skiers, one from Russia and one from Austria, were caught kissing sensually on the slopes before the competition, winter Olympics officials revealed.

One of the judges for the skiing competition, Igor Rasputinski revealed the racy details: “It was a gorgeous day, the sun streamed through the trees warming us. I was on the top of the slope and Olga, a very beautiful skier who was about to race, bent down to check her ski boots, when she looked up again she must have caught the eye of this fantastic looking Austrian girl. They immediately said a few words before they enjoyed a very sensual French kiss which went on for six minutes thirty two seconds, I was timing it. They looked in each other’s eyes again, then Olga went down the slope joined later by Andrea the other skier. I had to go and have a long cold shower afterwards, not out of my choice but because there is no hot water in the hotel showers in Sochi.”

The two skiers went on to win joint gold medals and were cheered by the joyous crowd.

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Reader support keeps the caffeine flowing.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by
    Tags: olympics

    Recent Posts

    LAMMY: Mandem to be Released Early

    LONDON - England - Labour Justice Secretary David Lammy is to release up to 6,000…

    14 hours ago

    15th Five-Year Plan: What China’s Development Means to the World

    DALIAN - China - The World Economic Forum meeting is upbeat about China’s 15th Five-Year…

    1 day ago

    When Mother Earth Speaks Humans Still Do Not Listen

    CARACAS - Venezuela - A 7.5 magnitude earthquake is a small reminder that humans are…

    1 day ago

    Unelected Comrade Burnham Ushering New Era of Communism

    MANCHESTER - England - Unelected Comrade Burnham has destroyed the last vestiges of democracy as…

    4 days ago

    People’s Republic of Soviet Britain Urgent Bulletin Regarding Comrade Starmer

    MANCHESTER - England - Good news comrades. Comrade Starmer has been apprehended and made into…

    4 days ago

    “Comrades, they are coming for me on Monday! This is it!”

    UNDISCLOSED LOCATION - Comrade Starmer has revealed in a communique that a dastardly coup is…

    5 days ago

    This website uses cookies.