Mourinho Gets Job As Arsenal Football Kit Washer Boy

LONDON - England - Since being sacked by Chelsea -- twice, Jose 'the special one' Mourinho has landed another job in football.

 

“After the game, usually when Arsenal wins, they throw their used socks, underpants on the floor or at my head. Then Wenger, he walk in and tell me to pick them up and clean it all up. It’s a good job they pay me £120 per week and I still get to watch real footsball, innit,” the former Chelsea manager told Football magazine.

Even though there used to be a certain rivalry between Wenger and Mourinho in the past, the Arsenal manager felt sorry for his former foe deciding to give him a job and a laundry sack instead of another sacking.

Mourinho hopes to get a promotion in a few years time, if he cleans up well to Emirates toilet cleaner, earning a whopping £200 a week.

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Reader support keeps the caffeine flowing.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by
    Tags: uk

    Recent Posts

    LAMMY: Mandem to be Released Early

    LONDON - England - Labour Justice Secretary David Lammy is to release up to 6,000…

    1 day ago

    15th Five-Year Plan: What China’s Development Means to the World

    DALIAN - China - The World Economic Forum meeting is upbeat about China’s 15th Five-Year…

    2 days ago

    When Mother Earth Speaks Humans Still Do Not Listen

    CARACAS - Venezuela - A 7.5 magnitude earthquake is a small reminder that humans are…

    2 days ago

    Unelected Comrade Burnham Ushering New Era of Communism

    MANCHESTER - England - Unelected Comrade Burnham has destroyed the last vestiges of democracy as…

    5 days ago

    People’s Republic of Soviet Britain Urgent Bulletin Regarding Comrade Starmer

    MANCHESTER - England - Good news comrades. Comrade Starmer has been apprehended and made into…

    5 days ago

    “Comrades, they are coming for me on Monday! This is it!”

    UNDISCLOSED LOCATION - Comrade Starmer has revealed in a communique that a dastardly coup is…

    6 days ago

    This website uses cookies.