Ashes: Revealed Secrets of the Aussie Batsmen

NOTTINGHAMSHIRE - England - Finally we can reveal the secrets of those Aussie batters during the Ashes 2015 series who so courageously lasted till before lunch with an amazing score of 60 all out.

Ashes to Ashes 

Up first was Stumpy, he doesn’t have any legs but can swing a bat slightly and he croaks like a toad when he’s annoyed. LBW and he’s off.

Next came Skippy, he’s a kangaroo and can only jump up and down, sometimes dinking the ball outside off with his swishy tail. Generally, he just likes to eat grass.

18.3

Then came Matilda, waltzing to the left, to the right, fresh out of the billabong, he slogs a blinder going hard at the ball inside edge but falls foul at the third slip just short of what he thought was a coolibah tree, which in reality was an oak.

Billy the sheep farmer didn’t fare any better by cocking one off the splice fresh out of the dip and into the wide open pen.

Won’t go into the rest but what a moment for Stuart Broad and England.

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Reader support keeps the caffeine flowing.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by
    Tags: uk

    Recent Posts

    Labour Mourns Downfall of Leftist Celebrity Hero Russell Brand

    MANCHESTER - England - The far-left and Labour Party are today mourning the downfall of…

    3 days ago

    Convicted Rapist Russell Brand to go to Prison

    LONDON - England - Former celebrity Russell Brand has been convicted of rape.

    4 days ago

    US Midterms: Lame Duck Trump Just Got Ducked in the …

    WASHINGTON - D.C. - There's blood on the cities of America after a midterm election…

    5 days ago

    Why Mission Uncrossable Became a Crash Phenomenon

    LONDON - England - When it comes to crash-style gaming, Mission Uncrossable is making huge…

    6 days ago

    London 2026 – The City of Shit

    LONDON - England - The capital city of Britain was once a great city but…

    1 week ago

    BUDGET SECRETS – Why Labour Needs the Neets

    MANCHESTER - England - It was a great Labour budget yesterday for the NEETS and…

    2 weeks ago

    This website uses cookies.