Sci/Tech

It’s Getting Worse! Now They’re Going to Have Brain Chipped Lawyers

LONDON - England - The Law Society wants to have lawyers brain chipped.

If it’s not bad enough having the sharks swimming around ready to take a huge chunk out of your wallet, now some cunt has come up with brain chipped lawyers to set upon the populace.

Electronic brain implants would make lawyers into walking legal dictionaries quickly scanning years of background material and cut costs in the future, a new report claims.

The report from The Law Society sets out the way the profession could change for employees and clients as a result of advances in neurotechnology.

“Chipped lawyers? Next they’re going to chip all great white sharks in the ocean!” one frightened person said when he heard the horrific news.

It suggests that a lawyer with the chip implanted in his or her brain could potentially scan documentation in a fraction of the time, reducing the need for large teams of legal researchers.

This hideous scenario would be quite a sight to behold. Imagine a court filled with these robotic super-lawyers all computing at the same time. What if one of them overheats?

 

 

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Reader support keeps the caffeine flowing.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    DEFENCELESS BRITAIN – The Practical British Prepper: A Three-Month Household Plan

    LONDON - England - Britain is defenceless and bankrupt. It is not too late if…

    1 day ago

    Why Labour is Destroying British Pubs

    LONDON - England - Labour is destroying British pubs. Across the British Isles, thousands of…

    3 days ago

    King Charles Agrees to Meghan Markle Statue at Buckingham Palace

    LONDON - England - King Charles III has agreed to a Meghan Markle statue to…

    6 days ago

    Dangerous Criminal Disappointed by Early Release Thanks to Labour

    WORMWOOD SCRUBS - England - A dangerous criminal is seriously disappointed with his early release…

    6 days ago

    Comrade Burn’em Residing at His Manchester Dacha For Holiday

    MANCHESTER - England - Comrade Burn'em has retired to his dacha up north after two…

    7 days ago

    Digital Science Launches Papers AI: an AI-Native Researcher Workspace for Writing, Data and Code

    LONDON - England - Digital Science launches Papers AI which gives researchers and students an…

    1 week ago

    This website uses cookies.