Sci/Tech

Man Who Received Pig Heart Transplant Suddenly Starts Exhibiting Pig Like Mannerisms

BALTIMORE - USA - A US man has become the first person in the world to get a heart transplant from a genetically-modified pig.

Peter Porque, 59, is doing well three days after the experimental seven-hour procedure in Baltimore, doctors say.

The gruelling operation was deemed a success, however doctors have noticed a few side effects of the procedure that they are studying eagerly.

“When he woke up, the first thing he said was ‘oink!’ and then he started sniffing the nurse’s arm pit,” Dr Jake Bacon, revealed to local news outlets.

Doctors at the University of Maryland Medical Center were granted a special dispensation by the US medical regulator to carry out the procedure, on the basis that Mr Porque – who has terminal heart disease – would otherwise have died.

The fascinating medical episode will certainly go down in history, especially as Mr Porque was served the usual hospital slop for lunch.

“He ate that slop up like it was the tastiest gourmet meal in the world. He was not hamming it up either, it all seemed very genuine. Most people barely get past the potatoes. He then asked for his next meal to be served in a bucket,” one of the nurse’s attending revealed.

Doctors studying their subject have also found that Mr Porque no longer walks upright but scoots around the floor on all fours oinking, farting and sniffing everything in sight.

The positive factor to take away from this story is that Mr Porque will live a long and healthy life, just as long as he does not get kidnapped by a farmer or something like that.

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Reader support keeps the caffeine flowing.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    LAMMY: Mandem to be Released Early

    LONDON - England - Labour Justice Secretary David Lammy is to release up to 6,000…

    24 hours ago

    15th Five-Year Plan: What China’s Development Means to the World

    DALIAN - China - The World Economic Forum meeting is upbeat about China’s 15th Five-Year…

    2 days ago

    When Mother Earth Speaks Humans Still Do Not Listen

    CARACAS - Venezuela - A 7.5 magnitude earthquake is a small reminder that humans are…

    2 days ago

    Unelected Comrade Burnham Ushering New Era of Communism

    MANCHESTER - England - Unelected Comrade Burnham has destroyed the last vestiges of democracy as…

    4 days ago

    People’s Republic of Soviet Britain Urgent Bulletin Regarding Comrade Starmer

    MANCHESTER - England - Good news comrades. Comrade Starmer has been apprehended and made into…

    5 days ago

    “Comrades, they are coming for me on Monday! This is it!”

    UNDISCLOSED LOCATION - Comrade Starmer has revealed in a communique that a dastardly coup is…

    6 days ago

    This website uses cookies.