Entertainment

Commissar Hislop Editor of Far-left Magazine to Appear on GB News

LONDON - England - Commissar Hislop, editor of a far-left magazine, is to appear on GB News.

BBC darling and member of the back-slapping far-left metropolitan elite socialist cabal of Marxist propaganda committee of Sissinghurst, Commissar Ian Hislop is set to appear on populist British news station GB News, it has been announced.

When not being a target of imaginary assassination attempts upon himself by non-existent assassins who really don’t give a shit if he lives or dies, commissar Hislop also edits a now far-left turned soporific magazine that used to be dangerous and edgy once, but now just panders to the usual banal socialist agendas of the day. Apart from being boring as fuck, commissar Hislop is also deeply predictable and entrenched in generic socialist talking-points that are commonly encountered during most necropurulent virtue-signalling, champagne socialist dinner parties or similar back-slapping, bottom-sniffing meetings at the illustrious Groucho Club in Soho.

GB News executive, Daryl Rhea, revealed that they have invited commissar Hislop to come to their television studios to film a special feature of the GB News £36,000 giveaway stint which they play on loop every 15 minutes of broadcasting day and night.

“We thought we would bring in commissar Hislop, to rear his pompous old boy network, rancescent socialist face to sell more premium phone charges that suck in our core audience of old boiled gammon slapping bastards who primarily come from the Midlands. It’s only £6,500 to send in a text, and £45,000/minute to phone in for a chance to win £36,000!”

But then again, who the fuck are we to quibble?

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