German Finds Perfect Way to Foil NSA Spies

MUNICH - Germany - Chancellor Angela Merkel is going to increasingly desperate lengths to preserve German national interests.

There’s something really special about the Germanic mindset, especially when it comes to engineering and cars. It’s a passion that has been honed to technical perfection, and some guy called Boba has found a great way to put this gift to good use and avoid the Stasi stare of the NSA with a little jalopy he put together in his spare time.

Coming in at a mere 1,150 bhp this 1987 Golf Mk2 would make Jeremy Clarkson’s arse fall out of his gawping mouth when it accelerates to 240km/hr in 3.2 seconds, and this is why Frau Merkel has ordered Boba to build a fleet of these things in the interests of German phone privacy.

“Angela saw my video and was immediately on the phone to me. She said she wanted one of these cars to drive around in when making important calls. This way the NSA won’t be able to get a fix on her signal. Absolute genius idea, and of course for national security, how could I refuse,” Boba said from his lock up garage in Munich.

Somehow, texting while driving this monster around may be a serious, no, no.

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by
    Tags: nsa

    Recent Posts

    50+ Investable Opportunities Found in a New Analysis Providing Economic Gains

    GENEVA - Switzerland - The World Economic Forum has identified over 50 investable opportunities offering…

    1 day ago

    Strait of Hormuz: Shame on Many Coward NATO Members

    LONDON - England - Multiple members of NATO have displayed their profound cowardice and shame…

    2 days ago

    Shia Islamic Iran Willing to Take Down Globe For the Twelfth Imam

    TEHRAN - Iran - The Shia Islamic Iranian Republic is awaiting the Twelfth Imam to…

    5 days ago

    Iranian Regime Now Releasing AI-Generated Disinformation of Captured US Soldiers

    LONDON - England - The U.S. Intelligence community needs to stamp down on the mass…

    1 week ago

    The Have-Nots Don’t Have Anything to Lose – But You Do!

    LOS ANGELES - USA - There are millions and millions of have-nots who don't have…

    1 week ago

    TRUMP: Kill One Ayatollah – Get Another One Free

    TEHRAN - Iran - President Trump sure got the deal of the century when he…

    1 week ago

    This website uses cookies.