Escaped Iranian Spy Could Be Cast as Next James Bond

The Iranian spy, Daniel Khalife, who escaped from a supposed maximum security jail, could be cast as the next James Bond, producers from Eon Productions have revealed.

“I mean, his escape was exactly how James Bond would have done it. What a feat. Right under the noses of the idiots who think they are prison officers. Well, it seems the Keystone Cops have finally caught the fellow, we are still hiring, and he’s fucking hired. Forget about all those other ponces who are trying to get the job, we want real spies with balls, not effete luvvie poseurs,” Rhubarb Broccoli, Cubby Broccoli’s nephew, revealed in Film Weekly.

According to reports from the shamed HMP Wandsworth prison, the Iranian spy crafted a makeshift belt from scraps and sneaked under a food truck from the kitchens, where he hoisted himself under the vehicle as it drove straight out the prison gates.

“James Bond has been played by an Australian, Scotsman, Irishman, Englishman and now why not an Iranian?” Broccoli added.

The next eagerly awaited James Bond film will probably be another woke, humourless mess, but isn’t every film released these days. It is to be expected as the entire industry has succumbed to the Marxist woke cult that is destroying the film business from the inside.