Life in Los Angeles Treating Harry, Meghan and Archie Well

Good news from the former royals who emigrated to Los Angeles filters through sometimes, amid the negative headlines.

It’s usually one of Meghan’s friends (Meghan actually) who reveals good news headlines to her controlled media outlets.

This time, Meghan’s ‘friend’ has revealed the good news that Meghan has had ass surgery to increase the size to Kim Kardashian levels, and then some.

“Meghan went to get more treatment for her 46-year-old skin when she got the idea whilst flicking through a magazine to get an ass implant. The doc did not hesitate and pumped her butt with gallons of silicone or sum concrete type sheeit. Apparently, Harry likes his beotches with back.”

Harry who used to speak with a sort of plummy, British officer accent, has now adopted a more American styling, according to reports.

Attending a Compton cookout on Saturday, the family turned up to their friend’s barbecue party where Harry gave an impromptu speech to the assembled ghetto people.

“We ghostrided the whip here, beotches, assembled some crunk to get to dis trap house niggaz! Y’all check ma ratchet’s new azz? I’ll be nuttin on dat laterz! That shit be costin serious gouda tho, watch dis shizazoe twerk, c’mon move it, ooh yeah! Ahmon git 730 on dat azz! Be trippin da jawn. Meghan, her gon get actavis on y’all talk sheeit about da atmphosfear and sheeit! We needs to git da carbon gaseous down n shiet! Wher da yayo at? Hmm, hmm triple cheeseburger some fries and a motherfuckin’ couple sodas and shieet and hot apple turnover and all that old shieet,…Who got the dub sacks?”