TV Producers: ‘Love Island’ to be Renamed ‘Death Island’

What happens when you put a bunch of narcissistic, low IQ, money and quick fame hungry parasites onto a ‘love island’ where these miscreants are forced to couple for the entertainment of others?

Inevitably, the whole tragedy of reality TV ends in death sooner or later, whether we are referencing cultural death, death of dignity, or actual death is not the point, death is something that all who participate in these types of shows embrace wholeheartedly.

“To call the show ‘love island’ is contradictory to the word ‘love’. There is no romantic love in the money-grabbing fame hungry shallow group of low IQ meatheads and slappers. This show is the exact opposite of love, and is more in tune with cheap, vulgar, tasteless displays of banal as muck useless eaters parading their narcissistic personalities and bodies in front of TV audiences that are no better. To watch this crude inglorious squalid degrading type of show is a pollutant that damages society deeply, and murders culture leaving a vile residue of diarrhea festering vomit and the stench of rotting corpses, bloated and black carrion flesh replete with a multitude of bluebottle flies ready to lay their eggs into the grey meat of death itself,” an ITV commissioning executive revealed himself, before realising the ultimate truth of what he had unleashed, thus committing suicide and clearing his account on humanity.

‘Death Island’ as the show will now be me more appropriately known will be more truthful to the image it portrays.

“To have some dumb Essex greasy haired single-brain-celled twat who has never read a book in his life, or even acknowledged anything else apart from his shallow obsession with his six pack, fake tan, and shitty tattoos commit Seppuku plunging a wakizashi deep into his abdomen slicing horizontally whilst the waiting kaishakunin finishes the ritual by observing the dakikubi technique leaving a little sliver of skin to embrace the head, would bring some form of honour and justice to the mere existence of this person on this earth and the TV show. Death Island would thus be a show where reality actually happened,” another ITV executive who had repented from his crimes against society and culture, revealed.