Entertainment

Star Wars Fans Furious After Disney Bring in Donald Duck

LOS ANGELES - USA - The latest character to be introduced into the Star Wars Disney films has infuriated diehard fans even more.

Kathleen Kennedy, the Disney film producer who incorporated a new feminized version of Star Wars replete with soy progressive ideologies, black and Vietnamese characters, transgender lesbians, female leads and polysexual robot fetishists, has now outraged Star Wars fans further by introducing an even more crazy character into the mix — Donald Duck.

The most recent Hans Soylo film flopped so hard at the box office that it did not even recoup the initial production costs let alone the astronomical marketing bill. Hans Soylo lost the film production company over $700 million dollars.

“Donald’s going to appear in the next Hans Soylo episode as a duck from the planet Quack. He will teach Hans Soylo about the ways of flying the Millennium Falcon. What better creature to teach Hans Soylo than a duck that has little wings that cannot actually lift him off the ground, plus Donald will be the first homosexual transgender lesbian soy drinking duck to frequent space, making it a sublime first in cinema..we’re breaking the boundaries.” an excited Kennedy revealed at yesterday’s press release in Los Angeles.

It seems the Star Wars franchise has been going from bad to worse, however the introduction of a talking duck should infuriate die hard Star Wars fans even further.

“Are you fucking kidding me? A fucking duck? This goes beyond the atrocious Hans Soylo film which was boycotted by many true fans, and has made a huge loss in cinema sales. This news is beyond that Jamaican nasty, Jar Jar Binks! These Disney and LucasArts people have ruined the franchise!” an irate true Star Wars fan revealed.

“A New Duck Bill” is currently in production and will cost an estimated $975 million to produce. Prepare to lose the fucking lot..you idiots..

Entertainment website, Entertainment quoted on its website that the film should be out for release by Christmas.

In other entertainment news — the Daily Squib has been classified in the TOP FIVE of UK Satire Sites on the prestigious Feedspot. 

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    “I WILL CARRY ON! CHAOS! I WILL CARRY ON! CHAOS! CHAOSSSSS!”

    PLANET SCUNTHORPE - KEIR DAVROS HAS MADE A DEFIANT SPEECH IN DEFENCE OF HIS RULE.

    19 hours ago

    Artificial Intelligence Emerging as a Key Competitive Advantage in Cybersecurity, New Report Finds

    GENEVA - Switzerland - Artificial intelligence is transforming the cybersecurity landscape at an unprecedented pace…

    3 days ago

    Comical Starmer Reassures Labour Party After Election Drubbing

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Comical Starmer has reassured Labour Party members that everything is okay…

    4 days ago

    LOCAL ELECTION RESULTS: “Comrades, everything is okay. Nothing has changed!”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Comrade Starmer is defiant despite massive Labour Party losses with the…

    5 days ago

    VOTE LABOUR: “Comrades, today I am ordering you to vote for Labour”

    SCUNTHORPE - England - Supreme Comrade Starmer is ordering all citizens of the People's Republic…

    6 days ago

    We’re Giving Away 1,000 FREE Tickets on an EXCLUSIVE Hantavirus Cruise

    SOUTHAMPTON - England - The Daily Squib is giving away 1,000 free tickets on an…

    1 week ago

    This website uses cookies.