New ‘Call of Duty’ Is Most Realistic Version Yet

“This is the most realistic game ever. I turned up at the enlistment office at 7am sharp. Then I had two enlisting agents tell me that this would be the best decision of my life. I would be able to see the world, have fun and shoot people. I just thought, hell, where do I sign up? The graphics for this game were so realistic as I signed on the dotted line. I had now signed away my soul, body and mind away to Uncle Sam. Next thing I know I was doing 50 pressups on the ground at revelry with a Sergeant shouting at me. I’m being shipped off to Afghanistan next week after basic training is over,” Andy Gomer Pyle, an ex-game software reviewer told the top industry magazine Plink.

All over America, kids are buying into the game by visiting an enlistment office in their area and joining ‘Call of Duty’.

“When it comes to graphics and in-game effects, this beats anything on the PS3 or X Box. I mean, one minute I was just a kid from an everyday suburb in Philly, the next I was shooting someone I never met before in the face because they wore a rag on their head. Man, it was like a dream come true,” Pfc Brad Kozlowski, who lost both legs, an arm, his testicles and an eyeball in an IED attack in Ocober told CBS.