Shock as Ageing Rock Star Leaves Wife for Teen Temptress

All the newspapers have been bristling with news that an ageing rickety old rock star left his wife after 30 years of marriage to go off with a young girl.

“Tight like a ..”

“This is a complete surprise and we would never have seen it coming. I mean, who would have thought an ageing rock star resembling a wrinkled old prune would hanker after some young hot tight flesh that bounces to the touch as opposed to something that resembles an old leathery corpse?” Reggie Newby, the rock star’s chauffeur told one of the tabloid papers yesterday.

The news that the rock star decided to enjoy the pleasures of the flesh with a young, hot piece of ‘chicken’ also comes with the news that the pope likes to hang out in Catholic churches and the Queen is rather partial to hanging around Buckingham Palace. Apparently, bears like to defecate in the woods too.