Elton John Making Immediate Plans to Travel to Russia to Meet Putin

MIAMI - USA - After a highly agreeable seminal phone call with Russian president Vladimir Putin, pop star Elton John is amassing his entourage and luxury travel bags for the long journey to Russia.

Pop star Elton John is making immediate plans to travel to Moscow, Russia for an urgent imaginary meeting with President Vladimir Putin to discuss the benefits of homosexuality.

“This is urgent. After the phone call with Putin I immediately announced to the world through social networks that I had a fabulous conversation with him. I am so excited to be invited to Moscow. Maybe we can have a Russian sauna and beat each other with twigs together, he is so macho and hunky. I hope the president has an Italian marble floor in his bathroom so Furnish and I can roll around on it,” Sir Elton said excitedly from his penthouse in Miami.

Sir Elton John is expecting a red carpet welcome to Russia and full hospitality including saunas, dancing boys and lots of unmentionable things.

John has a notoriously bad temper so these demands better happen, or else. You have been warned Putin.

Do you value freedom?

SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB We fight for freedom, justice, satire and coffee.
  • First they came for the Satirists
  • And I did not speak out
  • Then they came for the...
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    Homeless Fergie Found Under Waterloo Bridge

    LONDON - England - Yes, you guessed correctly. It's under Waterloo Bridge for the former…

    1 day ago

    Prince Andrew: “Why is it just the Brits in the Epstein files?”

    DUBAI - UAE - Prince Andrew decries why the Epstein files mainly focus on the…

    2 days ago

    Why I had to dump the “Jonah” Commissar Reeves from the China begging trip

    BEIJING - China - Comrade Starmer explains why he dumped "Jonah" Commissar Reeves from the…

    3 days ago

    Comrade Starmer Visiting Communist Comrades in China

    BEIJING - China - Comrade Starmer is on a visit to the communist country as…

    5 days ago

    Open Borders Socialist Spain Fast Tracks Half a Million Illegal Migrants Coming to UK

    MADRID - Spain - The far-leftist socialist government has fast-tracked citizenship for over half a…

    5 days ago

    Socialist Tory Party Disgusted as Conservative Defects to Brigand Bandit Group

    LONDON - England - Comrade Badenoch of the Socialist Tory Party is very angry that…

    7 days ago

    This website uses cookies.