Britain’s CGT Mass Exodus Marathon Starts Soon

LONDON - England - Investors and savers in the UK began the country's mass exodus today after the Con-Dem partnership announced another magnificently useless tax grab.

The new coalition government last week revealed their wonderful plan to increase capital gains tax to over 50% on all non-business assets which will be implemented in June.

Labour ministers have been gloating at the decrepit feeble coalition.

“We’ve got an ineffectual emasculated bunch of castrated Tories who are frankly yellow to the core. Then we’ve got the Lib-Dems who are basically like our Labour party, good-for-nothing pseudo Marxists on some kind of demented power trip to redistribute Britain’s wealth and give away billions of pounds to welfare scroungers. That’s why with the new CGT directive, everyone and their uncle are selling up and moving out. Soon all these babbling baboons will have, will be a ghost country full of benefits scroungers and tumbleweed. This bunch of morons will do more damage to the economy than we could have ever hoped,” a laughing Labour minister told the Mirror.

By punishing the people who have been prudent savers, the Con-Dem government have condemned Britain to another recession which will be worse than the first one.

“There is nothing to aspire to in Britain because if you save, if you work hard to earn money, it will be taken away from you and given to the black hole welfare state debt maelstrom of shit. We’re all fucked because of Cameron’s weakness, he’s a babbling baby with no bollocks of any kind. Sell up and leave
forever because it will only get worse
,” a Westminster insider revealed today.

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Reader support keeps the caffeine flowing.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    LAMMY: Mandem to be Released Early

    LONDON - England - Labour Justice Secretary David Lammy is to release up to 6,000…

    24 hours ago

    15th Five-Year Plan: What China’s Development Means to the World

    DALIAN - China - The World Economic Forum meeting is upbeat about China’s 15th Five-Year…

    2 days ago

    When Mother Earth Speaks Humans Still Do Not Listen

    CARACAS - Venezuela - A 7.5 magnitude earthquake is a small reminder that humans are…

    2 days ago

    Unelected Comrade Burnham Ushering New Era of Communism

    MANCHESTER - England - Unelected Comrade Burnham has destroyed the last vestiges of democracy as…

    4 days ago

    People’s Republic of Soviet Britain Urgent Bulletin Regarding Comrade Starmer

    MANCHESTER - England - Good news comrades. Comrade Starmer has been apprehended and made into…

    5 days ago

    “Comrades, they are coming for me on Monday! This is it!”

    UNDISCLOSED LOCATION - Comrade Starmer has revealed in a communique that a dastardly coup is…

    6 days ago

    This website uses cookies.