Wendi Deng to Marry Tony Blair in Iraq

The wedding of the millennium will take place in Baghdad’s notorious Sunni triangle inside a heavily fortified Bedouin tent this summer, the former prime minister of Britain’s aides have announced to the press.

“We thought, where could the wedding of the millennium be? Of course, the one place that Tony Blair liberated and brought freedom to — Iraq. The wedding will have all guests wearing suitable protective body armour and there will be a phalanx of mercenaries flanking the tent from all sides. Unfortunately, the wedding will not be a public affair as the couple respect their privacy, although photographers from a non-Rupert Murdoch owned publication will be flown in especially for the occasion in a multi-million pound deal,” Janice Applebee, one of Tony Blair’s senior aides revealed.

One Iraqi standing outside the Green Zone quipped: “I suppose what he did to Iraq, he did to that old bastard’s wife. No honour amongst criminals eh?”