Comrades, We Are Going to Bring in a Wonderful Property Poll Tax

Comrades, it has come to my attention that some of the working people within the population have aspired to acquire wealth in property. This aspiration is against Labour’s communist ideology, as we are transforming the People’s Republic of Soviet Britain from hard socialism to full communism. Comrade Lenin always stated: “The goal of socialism is communism.” This is why instead of paying a huge amount of council tax we will now make homeowners pay over £20,000 or £40,000 per annum just to live in a mediocre property. The new property poll tax will ensure poverty in Britain for generations.

Property Poll Tax

We want to punish working people who aspired to own a home, you are fucking capitalist scum. We want to hurt and punish all the working people. It makes me squeal with delight.

Lenin said: “The way to crush the bourgeoisie is to grind them between the millstones of taxation and inflation.” Indeed, we are following Lenin’s words in the Labour government today, as my low-growth policies have created an environment of extreme high inflation, high taxation and high unemployment.

Not only does the PRSB have the highest energy costs in the world, but food inflation is now so high, a small 80 gram block of cheddar cheese costs over £11.90 in some parts of London.

I am also making sure that if you try to sell your home, the Big State will confiscate a large chunk of the money from the sale in stamp duty tax. One way or another, we will ruin you working people fucking capitalist pieces of shit. We need your money for Big State pensions and salaries; for fat cat union bosses, and council bosses, and this is why we will redistribute your filthy wealth to the coffers of the communist state.

This week, I blame Brexit and Nigel Farage. Thankfully, the communists in Wales have made a deal with Labour to thwart any form of Reform in 2029. After 2029, the PRSB will be integrated into the Chinese model of communism fully, and there will never be any need for fake elections ever again.

Commissar Torsten Bell thought up the Mansion Poll Tax in 2015, and guess who’s behind the November budget? Yes, it’s Commissar Bell who has engineered this new impoverishment tax that will fuck you and your family for generations.

I am salivating and becoming sexually aroused at the thought of stealing all your money when I announce these policies in my Nightmare November budget. I will ruin the cunting working people, the fucking pensioners, the homeowners, anyone with assets, businesses, the kulak fucking farmers. Ooh, I just came a little right there. Excuse me comrades, I have to rush to my banya for a cold shower and afterwards I will visit a maternity ward in a hospital to feast on freshly newborn babies…crunchy and yummy.