“Comrades, great news, Britain’s quality of life now lower than Gaza”

News just in comrades, the quality of life and living standards in the People’s Republic of Soviet Britain is now lower than that of Gaza according to the G7 nations. This is all thanks to my growth budget which enabled serious growth in inflation, unemployment and taxation.

Comrades, I want more growth for the PRSB, and I know you cannot wait for my Nightmare Before Christmas Budget, which will bring more growth in taxation, more inflation, more unemployment and more growth in debt for the PRSB, along with more growth in immigration numbers.

Remember, it is all the fault of the capitalist scum like that fat orange cunt Trump, Brexit, Farage, and Mickey Mouse plus other people that we are forced to raise taxation on “working people”. None of this is of course the fault of my first punishing tax budget, the massive spending sprees on Big State salaries, the Laffer Curve, huge borrowing, stupid profligate spending, Net Zero, unions, council idiocy, etc., etc.

We said we support “working people”, and indeed we do. We support you by increasing taxes, council taxes, income taxes, national insurance taxes, wealth taxes, inheritance taxes, property taxes, we want to also bring out more subtle taxes so you will not notice your money disappearing so quickly. You are the “working people” so work hard you fucking tax cows, work yourselves to the bone in your jobs so that your money can be taken and spent on useless and expensive Net Zero projects that benefit no one apart from a few Labour higher-ups. Work in your fucking jobs so that the Big State can lavish vast pensions and salaries on its apparatchiks, work yourself to death you fucking pieces of shit so that when you retire and die we can take everything you worked for, leaving your family and children with nothing. Through our corrupt socialist system so normalised, you’ve stopped questioning it, you will work yourselves to death. Everywhere you turn, there’s a message telling you that you’re not enough, not successful enough, not beautiful enough, not happy enough. The Big State feeds off your misery, your tax. If you’re constantly chasing, you’re never present, and if you’re never present, you’re easy to control. You wake up, go to work, come home exhausted, distract yourself with screens, go to sleep, and repeat. Days turn into years, years into decades, and one day you wake up and realise you spent your entire life serving a system that never served you. But it goes deeper.

Labour’s evil Big State apparatus feeds on your stress, anxiety, fear, anger, and we have engineered a society that keeps you perpetually in these states. The news makes sure you’re afraid. Social media makes sure you’re comparing yourself to others. The failing economy built on debt makes sure you’re stressed about money. It’s a perpetual miserable tax farm, and you’re the fucking livestock and there’s no escape, prole scum — no escape.

PRODUCTION NEWS

In Sector 13 Grimsby, widget production increased by 0.0000015% this year. In sector 9, Scunthorpe, screw production increased by 0.000000000118%. Wheat production increased by minus 1,349% therefore all bread rations for proles will be ceased immediately. Oh, and Christmas has been cancelled until further notice. Have a nice fucking day.