Southern Sectors to Fund Northern Sectors With Poll Tax Increase

Comrades, we are further redistributing wealth from the southern sectors, where there are some bourgeoisie still surviving. As you know, communism is about collectivisation, and as yet, all of Soviet Britain is still not equal in poverty. Our Labour goal is to make the People’s Republic of Soviet Britain a more equal communist state like Cuba, N. Korea, Venezuela, where mass poverty is the great soviet equaliser. This is why the southern bourgeoisie scum – the ones who have not fled the PRSB – will have their Poll Tax raised disproportionally.

“The way to crush the bourgeoisie is to grind them between the millstones of taxation and inflation.”

Vladimir Lenin

Proles in the northern sectors will now enjoy the benefits that the southern sectors have enjoyed for too long. Northerners can now expect an amazing extra 1.2 grams of sugar rations per calendar month, and your used toilet paper rations will be increased to three rolls from the usual two.

None of these measures of course apply to high party officials, train drivers, union staff, civil servants, council bosses or NHS managers located in the southern zones who are on vast Big State appointed salaries and diamond plated pension plans.

Remember comrades, you are all working for the greater good of the People’s Republic of Soviet Britain and you must work harder to pay more poll tax to the Big State and 5-year Redistribution of Wealth Plan. I am now off to a penthouse in New York for another week of debauchery and luxurious gluttony thanks to a high party financier. This is something you fucking prole scum will never understand, just keep working hard to pay your poll tax.

INGSOC NOTICE 0990990-33-343938301100000-A6-119283838292920-4

DANNY PITTLEFETHERS, 23, OF 6 LIEBOUR AVENUE, SECTOR 92, SOUTH ENGLAND, WAS TODAY AWARDED 0.0017 GRAMS OF EXTRA ROTTEN TURNIP RATIONS FOR REPORTING HIS FOUR COUSINS, AUNTIE, SISTER, FATHER, GRANDMOTHER, LOCAL BUTCHER AND CAT CALLED PEEPS FOR SHOWING EMOTIONS OTHER THAN JOY DURING A BROADCAST FROM COMMISSAR RAYNER WHEN SHE REVEALED THAT THEIR POLL TAX CHARGES WILL BE INCREASED SOON. THEY WILL BE LIQUIDATED AND RECYCLED FOR SUSTAINABLE COMMISSAR MILIBAND NET ZERO PURPOSES NEXT THURSDAY! REMEMBER COMRADES, LOOK, LISTEN, REPORT!