NET ZERO NEWS: We’re Building More Runways at Heathrow Airport

LONDON - England - Commissar Reeves has hailed the new Net Zero emissions target to increase pollution by building more runways at Heathrow Airport.

Comrades, I come with some great news for Net Zero. The Labour government is going to build more runways at Heathrow Airport so that carbon emissions and noise pollution can increase to make your lives better. This is a net increase of over 2,400% for Net Zero carbon emissions so that we can increase pollution for everyone by 2030.

Reducing the UK’s carbon footprint is our top priority, and Labour plans to do this by increasing the number of runways at Heathrow Airport so that we can meet our sustainable carbon emissions targets of more carbon emissions pollutants by 2030.

Thanks to Labour’s Net Zero vision, thousands upon thousands more jet aeroplanes will spew out millions of more tonnes of toxic pollutants into the atmosphere when we build the new runways.

Remember, we’re here to help Britain reach its Net Zero targets by increasing pollution and protecting the environment when we build more runways at Heathrow Airport. *cough*

 

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