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‘Anti-Diversity Equity and Inclusion’ Los Angeles Fire is Now Under Control

LOS ANGELES - USA - Good news folks, the Los Angeles fire is now mostly under control, we think.

Phew! It’s okay folks, the horrible ‘Anti-Diversity Equity and Inclusion’ fires that threaten the productive careers of LA Mayor Karen Bass and LAFD Chief Kristin Crowley are mostly under control now.

DEI advocates blamed the fire for being too binary and racist: “It’s the fire’s fault, it should have been more gender fluid and black. Maybe the hydrants would have worked then.”

“There’s nothing to see here, please go back to your homes, oops, some of you don’t have homes any more. Hey, look on the bright side, at least the Smelt are safe swimming around in some far away river, and the $17 million cuts worked out fine in the end, huh!” Mayor Bass said at yet another press conference before announcing she will go on another holiday.

The LA Fire Department were filmed a week before the fire during a gruelling training session.

Meanwhile, Governor Gavin Newsom was defiant about his job performance when he recalled, “Yeah, some firemen came up to me and like were asking me why the fire hydrants don’t work. The fire department does not function without water, they said. I told them that the Smelt fish are more important than such trivial matters like water coming out of fire hydrants. I also told them to do their job, or they would be fired!”

Welcome to the Third World pretending to be the First World.

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