UK Population to Overtake Africa for First Time in History Due to Record Migration

C’mon on over, we have no space left on our once beautiful tiny island. Thanks to the EU laws and remainers blocking any action to try and slow the flow of migration, as well as an open door policy by the current conservative government — legal migration and illegal migration is completely out of control. Thank god for Brexit…er…yeah.

Migrants totalling the entire continent of Africa have migrated to the UK within the last two years, the ONS estimate showed. The ONS statistics reveal 1,433,354,588 people came to live in the UK in 2022 alone.

“Next year we hope to include the entire continent of Asia to travel to the UK and be given entry without any checks. The majority will all settle somewhere in Croydon, South London. I am sure we have enough space for them all,” a cheerful Home Office migration manager revealed.

Prime Minister Rishi Sunak said in a speech on Thursday that Britain is indeed “taking back our borders by letting in billions of migrants who will be very useful for the nation” he added that the “benefits of Brexit were really being exercised by the remainer government”.

“The benefits far outweigh the negatives of the massive influx for the UK population. Our plan is to flood NHS services until the entire service crumbles. Kill off the welfare and benefits system. Blight the nation with unsightly cheap housing. Flood the school system until that crumbles, and flood the roads so that no one can travel faster than 3 MPH. I have to thank my remainer cabinet members; the ECJ, the ECHR, my bosses in Brussels, the civil service remainers, Treasury remainers, Jeremy Hunt and the Bank of England for making life in the UK unliveable and truly horrific. No doubt you will vote for me and the conservatives to continue doing what we do best in 2024 — ruining your fucking lives you pompous English fucking peasants. I am now off to eat an expensive curry — fuck you all!”

Meanwhile, as the population of Britain rises, so is inflation rising at an exponential rate, as well as interest rates. Enjoy, and don’t even think of getting an appointment with your local GP for about six years.