Wrong Man Beheaded by Crazed Jihadist Team Wants Compensation

ALEPPO - Syria - Al Qaeda-linked jihadists in Syria who reportedly admitted beheading a rebel fighter by mistake are now being taken to court by the man for unlawful beheading, Syrian news reports claim.

“I just want my body back,” the beheaded man told an Al Qaeda affiliated news service in Syria.

The man is also demanding a full compensation package which could run into millions of Dinars if the case goes ahead.

For now, the man’s head is languishing in a fridge freezer and attempts to sew his head back onto his body have been unsuccessful.

Mahmoud Al Jizzeera, one of the rebels involved in the beheading explained how sorry the team were for chopping the head of the wrong man off.

“It was a mistake anyone could make. We were told to behead a man with a beard holding a gun and shouting Akbars every two seconds. Just take a look around,  you’d be hard pressed to find anyone else,” Mahmoud Al Qitira, another jihadist rebel leader exclaimed.”

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