BREAKING: Prince Andrew to Join Foreign Legion

The French Foreign Legion (Légion étrangère), France’s elite corp of fighting men who are mainly non-French citizens, have a stringent recruitment process that former royal, Andrew may not pass.

Out of all the military outfits, the French Foreign Legion have an esteemed reputation as being one of the most formidable military outfits throughout history. Many join the Legion to get away from their previous lives, some are running from failed romances, some are running from a life of crime, and others just want the supreme challenge of joining the Legion.

To gain the much coveted Kepi Blanc, the recruits will endure 17 weeks of gruelling training where many will be rejected or fall out.

Basic training for the French Foreign Legion is conducted in the 4th Foreign Regiment.

Initial training of 4–6 weeks at The Farm (La Ferme) – introduction to military lifestyle; outdoor and field activities. March (Marche Képi Blanc) – a 50-kilometer (31 mi) two-day march (25 km per day) in full kit, followed by the Kepi Blanc ceremony on the 3rd day. Technical and practical training (alternating with barracks and field training) – three weeks. Mountain training (Chalet at Formiguière in the French Pyrenees) – one week. Technical and practical training (alternating barracks and field training) – three weeks. Examinations and obtaining of the elementary technical certificate (CTE) – one week. March (Raid Marche) – a 120-kilometer (75 mi) final march, which must be completed in three days. Light vehicle driver’s education (driver’s license) – one week. Return to Aubagne before reporting to the assigned operational regiment – one week. Education in the French language (reading, writing and pronunciation) is taught on a daily basis throughout all of basic training.

Prince Andrew, who cannot speak a word of French, will find the linguistic side of training particularly hard. More accustomed to ordering palace staff around for mangoes and opening his curtains, he will also find it especially difficult keeping up with the hard training regime, even though he has been given special dispensation to join despite his age.

Royal commentator, Rupert Fortington-Smythe, was adamant that the former Duke would not receive any special favours or treatment in the Legion.

“He will be treated as any new recruit, and it is highly unlikely the pampered royal will be able to survive the first leg of training, let alone complete the entire session to gain the Kepi Blanc. I have seen seasoned U.S. Marines crack like little girls during the gruelling training, especially at his age. Although there is a cut-off period of 39.5 years of age to join the Legion, it is understood that the former royal will be given a special dispensation.”

Andrew’s aides were consistent with their view that he could easily breeze through basic training at the Foreign Legion, and he would be straightened out by the experience. He will be paid a salary of 80 euros per week. The good thing about the Foreign Legion is that Andrew will be in capable hands, and some barracks even have their own brothels so that legionnaires can release some of their pent-up energy, something the former royal will truly appreciate.

If you wish to join the French Foreign Legion (Légion étrangère) all applications are considered here

The French Foreign Legion accepts recruits from all over the world. The recruitment officially runs 24/7/365 (yes, you can join every day, all year long)

As a candidate/volunteer, you will be enlisted as a single person, even if you are married. The first contract you sign is mandatory for 5 years.

The entire recruiting and selection process takes usually 2 to 4 weeks (the exact period depends on each candidate). The process starts when you pass your passport to a serving legionnaire in a recruiting center or in an information office (see full list below).

The process ends when you are officially accepted or rejected. During the whole period — from passing the passport to a legionnaire until your acceptance or rejection — free accommodation, free food, and free clothing are provided to you by the Legion.

The candidates having passed all the tests are officially accepted or rejected every working Thursday afternoon. As a volunteer, you are allowed to ask to go home every morning during the entire selection process.