Congratulations to Robert Mugabe For Getting 140% of Votes

HARARE - Zimbabwe - It was another landslide win for Mugabe's Zanu-PF party today, with an incredible 140% of votes.

“We have a saying in my country, he who has the biggest armed mob wins. Oops I did it again. Until the next election eh,” a celebratory Mr Mugabe said from his plush palace situated 34 km from Harare.

Mr Mugabe, who has won every election since his rise to power has set an astounding record of votes gained in this latest election.

“It’s amazing, I knew the astounding results of the election before the votes were even cast,” an indepenent Zanu-PF electoral observer told state controlled news services.

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Reader support keeps the caffeine flowing.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by
    Tags: africa

    Recent Posts

    Labour Mourns Downfall of Leftist Celebrity Hero Russell Brand

    MANCHESTER - England - The far-left and Labour Party are today mourning the downfall of…

    3 days ago

    Convicted Rapist Russell Brand to go to Prison

    LONDON - England - Former celebrity Russell Brand has been convicted of rape.

    4 days ago

    US Midterms: Lame Duck Trump Just Got Ducked in the …

    WASHINGTON - D.C. - There's blood on the cities of America after a midterm election…

    5 days ago

    Why Mission Uncrossable Became a Crash Phenomenon

    LONDON - England - When it comes to crash-style gaming, Mission Uncrossable is making huge…

    6 days ago

    London 2026 – The City of Shit

    LONDON - England - The capital city of Britain was once a great city but…

    1 week ago

    BUDGET SECRETS – Why Labour Needs the Neets

    MANCHESTER - England - It was a great Labour budget yesterday for the NEETS and…

    2 weeks ago

    This website uses cookies.