LONDON - England - It's official, new revised figures confirm the good news that the UK did not actually go into a 'double dip' recession during the Great Depression we are currently in.
“We revised the figures again to show that we actually never had a ‘double dip’ although Britain’s economy is in a Great Depression with millions of people out of work and a drastic fall in household disposable income, as well as savings. In other words, if you’ve got any money in the bank it’s practically worthless,” an ONS statistician revealed today.
The UK’s trade deficit increased by £4.7 billion and one only has to look at the High Street to see how Britain is really doing.
Boarded up shops, dole queues at the local off licence and betting shops tell a different story to the chipper news from the Office of National Statistics.
“It’s great, I’ve got a Masters in Geophysics and I’ve been employed as a road sweeper for the past year since graduation. Life can’t be better,” a recent graduate told the Daily Telegraph.
LONDON - England - The NHS has released shock news that biological sex is a…
BRUSSELS - Belgium - The EU has ruined the internet with its myriad of totalitarian…
DOVER - England - According to reports, the Home Office can't find thousands of Rwanda…
LONDON - England - General AI is on the verge of being introduced into all…
MONTECITO - USA - Prince Harry made a new appearance wearing military medals on his…
SCUNTHORPE - England - A Labour think tank details its proposals for the government to…
This website uses cookies.