What Coronavirus Lockdown? It’s Like Day of the Triffids Out There

The sun is out and the Brits are attracted to it like bluebottles to a freshly laid dog turd. Britons are meant to be living under a coronavirus lockdown…yeah sure.

There is no supposed lockdown in London, or any other British city when we are having a sunny weekend.

The bike paths are full, cyclists jostling for some space, the parks are brimming with people picnicking and throwing balls at each other, all barely within a foot of each other.

The trains are full of people going on a day out, and all unmasked, breathing in the coronavirus deep into their lung tissue.

The beaches are full as the sun bathers all fight for some space a few centimetres away from each other, some coughing, others farting, as the sun beats down on their now red skin.

This is why the coronavirus in Britain will explode at a higher rate than other countries that have actually brought their armies out to enforce a proper lockdown.

Britain’s laissez faire attitude to this deadly virus will ensure many thousands will succumb to this evil Chinese pestilence and die horribly drowning in their own mucus.

Much like Day of the Triffids, these poor souls have no self-control, they have to look at the bright fireworks in the sky, ooh they’re so beautiful.

This time however, it is an unseen danger lurking amongst other people and the sunshine draws them all out, all these people breathing into each others faces spreading the virus.

Enjoy it now, because in a few weeks time you could be in a hospital bed under a lot of tubes, put into an artificial coma, as distraught apathetic overworked NHS nurses make the decision whether to turn the machines off or keep them running.