Iran Fires Off Few Pathetic Fireworks Avenging General’s Assassination

A broken bankrupt Iran has fired off a few short range missiles into U.S. bases in Iraq, as a pathetic retaliation to the assassination of General SoleImeini by the Americans. Tehran chose to forewarn the Iraqi Shiite regime who did not inform the Americans about the impending attack.

“This feeble rocket show was a capitulation by the Iranians, and a display of supreme weakness because Iran fears a war with the might of America as they know they would be crushed, despite their exuberant rhetoric. The Iranians will now retreat to their proxies, as is their cowardly stance to face the enemy. It seems Iran is ruled by cowards who cannot face their enemy head on. These are not real men, but pussies,” a relieved American commented on Wednesday.

With no casualties reported by the Americans, there is an emphatic feeling of relief that the Iranian response to the assassination of SoleImeini has been so pitiful.

After a period of three days of mourning, with crazed Iranians stampeding across the streets beating their chests and chanting for America’s death, one would think there would have been a more spectacular grandiose response to the death of the general, but instead, a few cheap missiles fired into a shed somewhere on an American base sufficed. More people died in the Iranian marches during the mourning period.

It seems SoleImeini was not worth much after all.

To their credit, the Americans are naturally jubilant that the Iranian response has been so limited so far, and Trump has been given a reprieve by the Iranians because they are so scared of a full conflict.

The situation could have been a lot worse, as some are depicting on Iranian TV — PURE FICTION.