Martin Luther King Honoured at Walmart Flash Mob Robbery Event

“We’ve come a long way since the sixties, and I know for sure that Martin Luther King would have been really proud of us,” Trayvon Jackson, 21, from Jacksonville, Florida told CBS news as he stuck six bottles of beer into his satchel and ran out of the store last night.

“I had a dream”

Flash mob robberies are the latest craze amongst ‘black teens’, dubbed by the muzzled American press as ‘young people’.

“When you have one African American kid go into a store and steal a load of booze and junk food, he can be arrested or stopped. When you have fifty or hundred walk into a store, bodega or gas station, there ain’t nothing anyone can do but watch in horror as your entire stock is cleaned out in less than fifteen minutes. This is the terrible beauty of mass flash robberies. By the time the police are on the scene, maybe twenty minutes later, they are gone. All you have are a few shots from a grainy video showing black kids with hoods stealing everything they can find, and a load of empty shelves,” Florida store owner, Al Harris, who has had his shop flash robbed three times in the same month, told local news stations.

Invariably, it is the few African Americans who are giving the rest a bad name with their actions, and as a result the media portrays black people in America in a negative light.

“Black people have done this to themselves. No one told us to go out and rob stores in large groups. No one told us to make ghettos. No one told us to present ourselves as gangbangers and pimps, rapping our gangsta music all over the place. We did this to ourselves, and we took our progress back fifty or sixty years. You don’t see other races doing this shit. Asian kids? Hispanic kids? White kids? Just niggas!,” Jurisha LaTrine, 54, a youth Councillor, told a local Florida radio station last night.