Obama to Have Face On New Dollar Note

Speaking from Capitol Hill, the former president said that he was truly honoured to be featured on the new zero dollar bills that will be printed.

“My fellow Americans and Kenyans. I am truly honoured to have my face on the new dollar bills that will come into circulation from next year. Please remember, whenever you spend your hard earned cash, how I have served our great nation. When you try and pay your rent, or buy some food to eat, when you try to fill your car with gas, take a long look at my face on that bill, and think about how I have consistently spent your cash, for nothing. What did you get out of my spending? Think to yourself, is your life better now? What about that ‘change’, can you feel the change? Well, with today’s prices, I doubt you will have much change left in your pockets. That’s for sure.”

The Secretary of Treasury, Larry Fleischman, has already conducted preliminary meetings with the BEP regarding the new Obama zero dollar notes and they should come into circulation.

Ordinary Americans were generally enthusiastic about the announcement that the new zero dollar bills with Obama’s head plastered all over them would soon be available.

Fredo Carmine, 37, an electrician from New Jersey said: “What the fuck? Now I gotta look at the mouli when I’m paying for everything. It’s like a double kick in the meatballs. Look at this frickin’ shit, I can’t even afford to buy my kid candy. What the fuck am I gonna tell my little Johnny? Obama ruined our fuckin’ economy and spent so much money that daddy can’t afford to even by you a stick of candy. Bullshit!”