TSA Speed Dating Now Big Hit at U.S. Airports

Check-in and security screening has never been so fun for single people looking to hook up with a nice ‘piece of ass’.

“They get us all into a room and then turn out the lights, then you hear machines whirring as the TSA screeners check to see the size of your genitals. Once that’s done, everyone has five minutes each with a TSA groper, and you have to make a decision if you like what they do to you or not before you go to your gate. Already we’ve had many hookups and this is getting real popular amongst the singles,” Alfie Newman, a TSA Speed Dating organiser told Groper magazine.

The TSA Speed Dating phenomenon has also made an impression outside of America, with many world travellers wanting to join in the groping fun and maybe enjoy themselves a bit after long international flights.

“It’s all a bit of fun. You go to check-in, then you hand over your luggage. I’m talking about getting my genitalia fondled by a complete stranger. It’s absolutely thrilling stuff,” Gerald Finklestein, 45, an accountant from Miami revealed.

The TSA is currently involved in making a website for the new TSA airport dating craze that has taken America by storm and made flying a much more pleasurable experience.