I Will Re-awaken Enterprise by Increasing Taxation Says David Cameron

LONDON - England - David Cameron will pledge today to “reopen Britain for more recession” as he lays out his vision of a more taxed economy, less reliant on enterprise and freedom.

Mr Cameron said that his Government’s priority is to transform the
economy from a “limping wounded post-Labour casualty to a dead carcass over-taxed piece of squashed roadkill”.

Starting with action to tackle the £156 billion deficit. He
will signal an increase in all tax and red tape, and the creation of a
simpler tax system of complete taxation.

“Instead of working for 230 days in a year before you make money for yourself, as was the case under Labour, you can now work for 300 days in a year before you make any money for yourself under the Con-Dem leadership and we might throw in a bonus work day for you as well. Remember that the money you make for your hard work will go to benefits scroungers so that they can enjoy their 48 inch plasma screens and daily drugged up booze playstation 3 sessions in their 4-storey Putney townhouses,” Mr Cameron told business delegates at the Holiday Inn conference centre near Heathrow airport.

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Reader support keeps the caffeine flowing.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    Nvidia’s Huang Put His Wang in a Huang

    SILICON VALLEY - USA - Nvidia shares have fallen sharply after the CEO Jensen Huang…

    40 mins ago

    Labour Mourns Downfall of Leftist Celebrity Hero Russell Brand

    MANCHESTER - England - The far-left and Labour Party are today mourning the downfall of…

    3 days ago

    Convicted Rapist Russell Brand to go to Prison

    LONDON - England - Former celebrity Russell Brand has been convicted of rape.

    4 days ago

    US Midterms: Lame Duck Trump Just Got Ducked in the …

    WASHINGTON - D.C. - There's blood on the cities of America after a midterm election…

    5 days ago

    Why Mission Uncrossable Became a Crash Phenomenon

    LONDON - England - When it comes to crash-style gaming, Mission Uncrossable is making huge…

    6 days ago

    London 2026 – The City of Shit

    LONDON - England - The capital city of Britain was once a great city but…

    1 week ago

    This website uses cookies.