UK and US to Undergo ‘Special Relationship’ Counselling

The so-called ‘special relationship’ is in the doldrums and this time it looks serious, British MPs have revealed this week.

First it was the bust of Churchill unceremoniously dumped by Obama when he first moved into the White House, then it was the collection of second-hand DVD’s given to Prime Minister Gordon Brown after the first brief meeting between the two leaders and after that the waterboarding incident that caused a few ripples.

“It’s not so much a ‘special relationship’ now, more like an ‘unremarkable disdain’,” the British ambassador to Washington, James Ganymede, told the Telegraph.

The ‘special relationship’ counsellor, Al Imey, was yesterday in consultation with both sides in a Washington conference hall trying desperately to bring both parties to talk to each other again.

“They’re both hogging the sheets. Like there’s no more adoring photoshoots of the kind we had with Maggie and Ronnie, or Dubya and Tony. Those were loving relationships, now we got cracked ice. Before, America would say ‘jump’ and the UK would obey, the thing is, the US doesn’t care anymore. Barry is not even saying ‘jump’, he just doesn’t say anything. I guess they’ve grown apart. Obama is into his Healthcare, and Brown is into trying to get elected for the first time,’ Mr Imey said.

Maybe the Americans could replenish their ‘special relationship’ with the British by invading another country together. There is nothing like a ‘shared activity’ to bring forth a fresh connection once again. Here’s to new invasions.