United Nations to Evacuate Brangelina Children After Split

LOS ANGELES - USA - The United Nations has mobilised an evacuation force for the adopted children of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie after they announced their divorce yesterday.

After news came through yesterday that Hollywood film stars Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie had split, the United Nations intervened to try and repatriate the adopted children back to where they had been bought.

“This is a huge operation and we are working against time here. We are mobilising helicopters, trucks and transport aircraft. The amount of children that Angelina adopted is a force to be reckoned with; some of them from Africa, South America and the Far East. It is a massive logistical operation that will take many resources to pull off. We appeal to everyone to show some restraint during the rescue mission,” UNICEF’s Senior Director of Operations, Gonzalez Demerera, told CNN yesterday.

The Brangelina clan have enjoyed a good number of years touting baby pictures as well as accumulating numbers but it looks like time has finally caught up with the dysfunctional family.

Do you value freedom?

SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB We fight for freedom, justice, satire and coffee.
  • First they came for the Satirists
  • And I did not speak out
  • Then they came for the...
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    Homeless Fergie Found Under Waterloo Bridge

    LONDON - England - Yes, you guessed correctly. It's under Waterloo Bridge for the former…

    1 day ago

    Prince Andrew: “Why is it just the Brits in the Epstein files?”

    DUBAI - UAE - Prince Andrew decries why the Epstein files mainly focus on the…

    1 day ago

    Why I had to dump the “Jonah” Commissar Reeves from the China begging trip

    BEIJING - China - Comrade Starmer explains why he dumped "Jonah" Commissar Reeves from the…

    3 days ago

    Comrade Starmer Visiting Communist Comrades in China

    BEIJING - China - Comrade Starmer is on a visit to the communist country as…

    5 days ago

    Open Borders Socialist Spain Fast Tracks Half a Million Illegal Migrants Coming to UK

    MADRID - Spain - The far-leftist socialist government has fast-tracked citizenship for over half a…

    5 days ago

    Socialist Tory Party Disgusted as Conservative Defects to Brigand Bandit Group

    LONDON - England - Comrade Badenoch of the Socialist Tory Party is very angry that…

    6 days ago

    This website uses cookies.