Tony Blair to be Paid to Talk About His War Crimes

“The only way you can get Tony Blair to do anything is to pay him thousands of dollars,” remarked an eager Texan businessman who is desperate to hear Tony Blair speak about the atrocities committed in Iraq under his name.

It is quite fitting that the ex-PM is now coming to the heart of Texas to give the speech, as this is the home state of George W Bush, an acquaintance of Mr Blair.

The lecture hall in Houston,Texas, was hired by a group of 35 businessmen who were eager to see Mr Blair speak.

“The British Ex-PM said that his rate is $150,000 per three hour speech. So we had a whip round and he accepted to speak about the illegal war in Iraq and how he was complicit in the murder of over six million people,” Geoffrey Sharpton, one of the organisers told the Texas Times.

Tony Blair, who is immune to any form of prosecution, is above all law so will never be prosecuted for his war crimes.