Pigs Trough to be Installed in Houses of Parliament

LONDON - England - Members of Parliament were in an ecstatic mood today after it was announced that a pigs trough would be installed in the House of Commons.

Members of Parliament have hailed the unelected leader of the government, Gorgon Swine’s moves to install a pig’s trough in the middle of the House of Commons chamber so that MPs can conduct their business under more favourable conditions.

Liars-in-State

“This brings a new meaning to parliamentary question time. The swine will simply feed at the trough when they enter the pigs chamber. This will certainly rival the Lord Chancellor’s breakfast, as the dishonourable members all vie for the tastiest morsels which will be thrown into the trough from a slop bucket. This will be the Serjeant at Swine’s job and once he fills the trough, it’s basically a free for all. Those who don’t kick, lie, backstab, push and bite to get the best bits will be left behind — much like real life politics don’t you think?” a political commentator told the Daily Squib.

There have been further rumours circulated that the parliamentary swill session may be televised although negotiations are currently taking place with Rupert ‘Lizard’ Murdoch.

Some entrepreneurial MPs say that they would even back a public gallery opening directly above the MP swine feeding trough so that members of the public could watch the filthy proceedings from behind some reinforced plexi-glass.

“We could charge members of the public to watch us conducting business in the trough. Yes, we could charge them £10 per head to watch our snouts digging into the trough of inequity,” a Labour backbencher snorted.

Do you value freedom?

SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB We fight for freedom, justice, satire and coffee.
  • First they came for the Satirists
  • And I did not speak out
  • Then they came for the...
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    Homeless Fergie Found Under Waterloo Bridge

    LONDON - England - Yes, you guessed correctly. It's under Waterloo Bridge for the former…

    1 day ago

    Prince Andrew: “Why is it just the Brits in the Epstein files?”

    DUBAI - UAE - Prince Andrew decries why the Epstein files mainly focus on the…

    2 days ago

    Why I had to dump the “Jonah” Commissar Reeves from the China begging trip

    BEIJING - China - Comrade Starmer explains why he dumped "Jonah" Commissar Reeves from the…

    3 days ago

    Comrade Starmer Visiting Communist Comrades in China

    BEIJING - China - Comrade Starmer is on a visit to the communist country as…

    5 days ago

    Open Borders Socialist Spain Fast Tracks Half a Million Illegal Migrants Coming to UK

    MADRID - Spain - The far-leftist socialist government has fast-tracked citizenship for over half a…

    5 days ago

    Socialist Tory Party Disgusted as Conservative Defects to Brigand Bandit Group

    LONDON - England - Comrade Badenoch of the Socialist Tory Party is very angry that…

    7 days ago

    This website uses cookies.