Brexit: Volcanoes and Lava Would Engulf Britain

Scientists from the David Cameron Office of Geology, situated in the town of Bullingdon, Oxford, have revealed terrifying news that volcanoes and lava could cover large parts of Britain if the people vote to leave the European Union.

“As soon as there is a Brexit, a massive volcano would rise up through Birmingham and Coventry. Lava would spit out burning everything in its path, and horrible grey ash would be thrown for miles across the British Isles. The lava would cover everything in the UK including London. Vesuvius would be like a walk in the park compared to this thing going off,” Trent Dallingpole, a key researcher on the team told the BBC.

As well as volcanoes, there would be massive earthquakes belting out richter scale 14 tremors and most of Britain would disappear into a big fucking crevice filled with molten lava.