First Ever African American Joins Ku Klux Klan

After the announcement in February that the Ku Klux Klan endorsed the first ever African American presidential candidate, there have been celebrations all over America within all communities whether black, white, Hispanic or Asian.

Irrespective of religion, creed or colour there has been a joining of forces that has been unrivalled in American history.

“I want to thank the Daily Squib for being the ones who had the guts to run the story in the first place. Without them there wouldn’t be the mass unity that we are now seeing. The race issue is always brushed under the carpet in the United States and we need to address it,” Ron Emerson told us from his Washington offices on Capitol Hill where he is spearheading a race awareness campaign for Obama’s 2008 Election candidacy.

It seems what we are truly seeing a shift in the politics of a nation that has been fractured for quite some time.

This is how America should be – a land where everyone stands together with “justice and freedom for all.”

Senator Obama has brought unity to America already with his campaign and his forthright stature has remained untarnished amongst the mudslinging oppositional reposts.

“The Democrats have damaged their own ranks and now it is time for true unity if we really want to win this thing. I read the comments people left behind on the Daily Squib KKK Obama article and I see a true hunger that people have to express their feelings on this issue. Isn’t it funny that it took a newspaper from England to address these real issues because the US media is scared to even go there,” an Obama campaigner from Illinois said.

Indeed, there needs to be a forum for informed discussion on the subjects mentioned above and it is a testament to the Daily Squib that the Ku Klux Klan are finally opening the doors after hundreds of years in the wilderness to a man of colour.

Cleavant Tupac D’shaun lives in Kentucky and is 43 years old. He lives a quiet life in the small town of Bear Wallow, Kentucky and is unemployed. He has 12 children and is a proud African American of Jamaican descent.

“I joined the KKK because they were recruiting in town one day and I thought I would give it a go for some fun. A kind looking old white gentleman with a cape said that there would be free food at the KKK HQ and a party for all.”

After the joining ceremony where Cleavant was inducted into the Ku Klux Klan he was given a cloak of his own and told to swear an oath to uphold the true Christian values which have been the cornerstone of the KKK since the beginning of their organisation.

The Daily Squib asked the local Ku Klux Klan office what the reasoning in their actions was and if this was a true gesture of solidarity with African American people across America.

“These are small steps for the Klan but today was a historic moment for the Klan as a whole. We have embraced our Christian brothers whatever their colour or sexuality. Jesus himself was a dark-skinned Jewish man with a hook nose and he is our true saviour. We must reach out and throw away the horrible prejudices of the past eras which are entrenched in awful ignorance and isolationism,” Imperial Knighthawk, Enos Vinton told the Daily Squib.

Enos then lights up a huge Jamaican spliff resembling a Camberwell carrot, inhales for a few seconds then blows the wondrous smoke out sighing with pleasure.

Looks like the KKK have finally found their true roots.