Swarms of Giant Bees Attacking South African World Cup Stadiums

CAPE TOWN - South Africa - Millions of noisy angry African bees have been attracted to the stadiums where the world cup games are being held, South African FIFA officials have revealed.

“The sound of the swarming bees is deafening. No one on the pitch can hear the referee blow his whistle and no one can hear the crowd cheering. The angry African bees seem to be attracted to the bright coloured football kits of the players and the bright clothes of the fans,” a FIFA match official told South Africa’s weekly, the Soweto Telegraph.

The bee swarms have invaded all of the stadiums where every world cup fixture is being held, and a number of people have been stung by the bees.

“Being stung by the bees was nothing, it was the bloody noise they made that really hurt. I’d rather be stung on my nut sack then listen to that racket all day,” Geoffrey Alcoa, a fan who travelled all the way from Holland said.

Roger Attenberry, a naturalist filming a BBC nature program in the Kruger national park said: “One of my assistants managed to capture a few bees for my analysis from the stadium in Johhanesburg. After studying them I have identified the bees as part of the Vuvuzelus Apis genus. A particularly aggressive and noisy strain of bee that is attracted to South African football matches.”

ADVERTISE ON THE DAILY SQUIB

Email advertising (at) dailysquib.co.uk for all your advertising needs.
  • SUPPORT THE DAILY SQUIB
  • We fight for freedom, justice, satire, and coffee.
  • Reader support keeps the caffeine flowing.
  • Disqus Comments Loading...
    Share
    Published by

    Recent Posts

    DEFENCELESS BRITAIN – The Practical British Prepper: A Three-Month Household Plan

    LONDON - England - Britain is defenceless and bankrupt. It is not too late if…

    1 day ago

    Why Labour is Destroying British Pubs

    LONDON - England - Labour is destroying British pubs. Across the British Isles, thousands of…

    3 days ago

    King Charles Agrees to Meghan Markle Statue at Buckingham Palace

    LONDON - England - King Charles III has agreed to a Meghan Markle statue to…

    6 days ago

    Dangerous Criminal Disappointed by Early Release Thanks to Labour

    WORMWOOD SCRUBS - England - A dangerous criminal is seriously disappointed with his early release…

    6 days ago

    Comrade Burn’em Residing at His Manchester Dacha For Holiday

    MANCHESTER - England - Comrade Burn'em has retired to his dacha up north after two…

    1 week ago

    Digital Science Launches Papers AI: an AI-Native Researcher Workspace for Writing, Data and Code

    LONDON - England - Digital Science launches Papers AI which gives researchers and students an…

    1 week ago

    This website uses cookies.